A Guy Walks into a Bar with a Dog…
A guy walks into a bar with a dog under his arm, puts the dog on the bar, and announces that the dog can talk and that he’s willing to bet $100 with anyone who says he can’t.
The bartender quickly takes the bet. The owner looks at the dog and asks, “What’s the thing on top of this building that keeps the rain from coming inside?” The dog answers, “Roof.”
The bartender says, “Who are you kidding? I’m not paying.” The dogs owner says, “How about double or nothing, and I’ll ask him something else.”
The bartender agrees. The owner turns to the dog and asks, “Who was the greatest ballplayer of all time?” The dog answers with a muffled “Ruth.”
With that the bartender picks them both up and throws them out the door. As they bounce on the sidewalk, the dog looks at his owner and says “DiMaggio?”
Too True…
Two politicians are having lunch together. All of a sudden one stands up and shouts, "You’re lying." The other replies, "I know, but just hear me out."
A Failure to Communicate…
“There’s a fire raging out of control west of town, and I want you to get out there, and fast,” the hard-charging newspaper editor shouts at his star photographer. “I want a front-page photo, and I don’t care if that means you have to hire an airplane. Just do it. Don’t worry about the expense.”
So the photographer calls the airport and orders a plane. Grabbing his best equipment, he rushes out to the airport, spots a small aircraft with a young pilot in it, pulls open the door, jumps in, and shouts to the pilot, “Okay, I’m ready. Take off!”
As directed, the pilot takes off, gets up to altitude. A few minutes later, the photographer says loudly so he can be heard over the sound of the engine, “See that fire raging to the west? I want you to fly over that and get down as close as you can.”
Incredulous, the pilot says, “You want me to fly over that fire?”
“Absolutely,” the reporter says, “I’m an award-winning photojournalist and that’s why I am here – to take a front-cover shot of the fire!”
The pilot looks over with a quizzical look on his face and says, “You’re not the flight instructor?”
The capitalist system has lifted mankind out of mass poverty. It is this system that in the last century and in the last generation, has progressively changed the face of the world, and has provided the masses of mankind with amenities that even kings did not posses or imagine a few generations ago. - Henry Hazlitt
A nation that encourages its people to spend more and save less... promotes economic backwardness, social decay and its own financial doom. - Dr. Kurt Richebacher
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