CONSERVATIVE VS LIBTARD

THE RETURN OF THE KERALA CONSERVATIVE

The following is the complete (so far) amended and expanded version of the continuing education series on liberalism:

Shhh! Quiet, class is in session.

Liberalism 101 Lesson 1:
There is no amount of the money that you earn, but really belongs to the community, that liberals do not feel privileged to take.
There is no amount of the money that you earn, but really belongs to the community, that liberals are not indeed entitled to take.
If you scream because we have gotten to the point of squeezing blood from a turnip, then you are evil.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 2:
Government is here to help us.
If government, either local, state or federal spends more money than it rakes in, then that is to be corrected by government spending even more money because:
Government is here to help us.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 3:
If you are struggling under the weight of ever upward spiraling taxes and voice any complaint then you will be accused of not “caring” because, after all:
It’s for the children.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 4:
When liberals use the phrase “Founding Fathers” they are speaking of Karl Marx, Vladimir Lenin and Joseph Stalin, any mention of Washington, Jefferson or Madison will illicit derision or a blank stare.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 5:
Anything individualist is to be demonized loudly and forcefully.
Anything collectivist is to be praised and trumpeted.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 6:
If you expose the truth about liberals, you're a “hater”.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 7:
Liberals are exempt from making any sacrifice that impinges on their lifestyle or bank account.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 8:
If debating a conservative avoid the subject and engage in ad hominem attacks and straw man arguments.
If your opponent makes an irrefutable point accuse him of avoiding the subject and engaging in ad hominem attacks and straw man arguments.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 9:
Support unions and pay your dues so that the unions can donate your dues money to liberal politicians so that they can be elected and take your taxes and use them to support unions.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 10:
Absolutely anything that is without question bad for or destructive to America is to be advocated and supported by liberals because:
America is evil.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 11:
Any criticism of leftist dogma or the leaders who espouse it is to be characterized as “bigoted”, “hateful” or “racist”.
“Xenophobic” applies as well if the criticized dogma happens to be our necessary opened borders policy. (See lesson 32)
Liberalism 101 Lesson 12:
Any spending by conservatives must be “paid” for through ever increasing taxation, most especially if it is constitutionally mandated.
Any spending by liberals is to be accepted by the peasant “masses” and will be boundless. “Paid for” is replaced by “damn the cost, full spend ahead!”
Liberalism 101 Lesson 13:
Liberals are allowed 500 different media outlets to promote their destructive agenda. They are allowed to do things that as much as constitute throwing presidential elections with impunity.
Conservative media outlets, though they number not one tenth of liberal media outlets, are to be excoriated for merely existing.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 14:
Racism can be blamed on anything and everything, especially anything and everything conservative because:
America is racist.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 15:
Calling a black person who has escaped the liberal plantation an “Uncle Tom”, “Porch Monkey”, “House Niggah” or any other form of racial epithet is definitely NOT racist.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 16:
There is literally nothing that cannot be blamed on Global Warming (warning, Global Warming is the exclusive property of Leftist Propaganda Inc.)
Liberalism 101 Lesson 17:
Distort, bend, fold and staple the truth, after all:
By any means necessary means by ANY means.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 18:
Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results is definitely NOT insanity as it has been erroneously defined.
It is what liberals call “sound economic policy”.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 19:
There is no exaggerating the importance of liberals and our quest to “fundamentally change” America into a Marxist utopia.
The hoi palloi must be made to know who their betters are for without liberals they will never be able to grasp what is good for them.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 20:
It is incumbent that all tolerate what liberals say must be tolerated in the name of tolerance.
But the intolerance of liberals is to be tolerated by those who cannot abide it.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 21:
Thou shalt not believe in any other God except the Great God, thy government.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 22:
Is a practicing Liberal / Progressive / Socialist it is imperative that you avoid the temptation to think. At all costs, you must not take into consideration facts, science, economic history, political history or simple math because these areas of information and thought will only lead you astray
Liberalism 101 Lesson 23:
The military is where many conservatives enlist, go through boot camp and learn leadership, responsibility and how to deal with the harsh realities of life.
College is boot camp for liberals where liberal professors teach them how to avoid leadership, responsibility and how to blame with the harsh realities of life on conservatives.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 24:
Fetus is a medical term used to describe a lifeless unviable tissue mass from conception to the point of birth then discussing the sacrosanct and inviolate right of women to privacy and to choose.
Endangered species is a term used to describe bait fish, bugs, and rodents that have a clear right to life.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 25:
True patriotism includes thrashing the military because, as we well know, the US military projects America’s evil intent (See Lesson 10).
Liberalism 101 Lesson 26:
When all else fails, blame Bush.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 27:
It is incumbent that all liberals speak and act as if they are foreign policy experts who have America’s best interests at heart.
If a conservative points out that current events or historical facts make a mockery of the previous statement it is to be ignored of defined as “hate speech”.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 28:
Liberal organizations are all charged with advancing our progressive agenda but the masses are notorious for failing to understand that we labor only for their own good.
Therefore we must wrap the names of these organizations in sheep’s clothing with things like the American flag (a representation of the evil, hatred, and racism of America which we will use to our advantage until such time we can dispense with it). We will use names like “People for the American Way” and “American Civil Liberties Union”, issue vague and flowery literature and keep peasantry lulled into complacency so as to diminish opposition.
Liberalism 101 Lesson 29:
Even while advocating and implementing Marxist/Leninist policy we must deny we are doing so. Deception is key to implementation since the little people are incapable of grasping what is in their best interests. (See lesson #17)
Liberalism 101 Lesson 30:
To establish control over the peasant class liberals must ensure that they are the ones to define what will be controlled.
To allow toothless rubes to make their own decisions as to what they can eat, drink, buy, smoke, drive or whatever is dangerous and MUST be stopped at all costs. (See lesson 19)
Liberalism 101 Lesson 31:
Detroit is the Petri dish of liberal economics.
We are not ever to acknowledge the third world disaster area it has become unless it is to blame evil corporations and conservatives. (See lesson 26)
Liberalism 101 Lesson 32:
Liberals are committed to creating as many voters as possible in order to maintain power.
In that endeavor we use many different means such as registering the dead on voter rolls. To that end we must ensure that our open borders policy is kept safe from racist xenophobic conservatives so that as many undocumented voters are allowed in as possible.
If conservatives point out the carnage caused by necessary policy remember to counter with the fact that they are racist and xenophobic. (See lessons 19 and 29)
Liberalism 101 Lesson 33:
Hypocrisy is a special word that defines the moral inconsistencies that liberals see in others.
Since there are no moral inconsistencies in liberal thought or applied philosophy, this word has no application in the description of liberals.